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(... The next story in the Fairy Tales & Nursery Rhymes for Adults Only! {{{{^_<}}}}









Miss Muffet's Revenge (Humane Version)

Jackson came up to me during my morning workout. I was just in mid-crunch when he said to me tentatively, "Uh... sweetie... Spyddie escaped."

I completed my crunch as a scream escaped from the top of my lungs.

In the year that we had been married, Jackson & I NEVER raised our voices to each other. This time I made an exception.

"THAT'S IT! I... HAVE... HAD IT! IF I'VE TOLD YOU ONCE, I'VE TOLD YOU A THOUSAND TIMES... KEEP THAT DAMNED PET SPIDER OF YOURS IN A COVERED TANK... PREFERABLY OUT OF MY VIEW! YOU KNOW I'M SCARED OF SPIDERS! I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY YOU KEEP THAT SHIT! I DIDN'T ASK MUCH FROM YOU WHEN WE GOT MARRIED!!!! All I asked was to get rid of the spider because it scares me."

"Well, he's scared of you too..." Jackson defended meekly.

"Yeah, but I only have 2 legs! If I find it anywhere near..."

The next thought stopped me dead in my tracks. He waited with bated breath...

"Tuffet... " I said softly. "MY BABY!!!! MY BABY!!!!"

"Oh no..." he added. "Now, Rob, don't do anything rash! Think before you act! I'll check Tuffet."

I could barely here him. By this time I ran into the kitchen & grabbed the largest butcher knife in the cutlery set. "Not my baby..."

"I checked the Tuffet's room. Spyddie's not there & Tuffet's asleep. I'll check the rest of the house!"

"You do that." I said tersely.

I check the baby's room myself. I placed the butcher knife on the floor. Tuffet was fast asleep on her back in her crib making that sucking motion with her tongue as all baby's do as they sleep. I noticed that on her baby table there was still a half-empty bowl of Farina sitting there.

"My little angel... she didn't even finish her..."

And that's when I saw it... out of the corner of my eye... I could see a lump under the baby blanket, just a short distance from my sleeping child's legs. I pulled the cover back and saw the bug slowly crawling toward my child.

That... was the straw... that BROKE my camel's back!

I picked up Tuffet. I lifted her pink bunny jammies to see her clear tan skin. I also looked at her curly sandy brown scalp. No red blotches. No spots. No bite marks. Her little chin rested on my shoulder as her father came in the room. "Still no sign of..."

"Here." I placed Tuffet in his arms and told him to check her legs, because Spyddie was in the crib.

"What are you going to do?" he asked with a sense of urgency in his voice.

"Don't worry about it, Jack. Spyddie was near our child... our SLEEPING child."

He tried to appeal to my sense of reason. "But sweetheart, I had him defanged. & He's not poisonous, never was!"

"I don't care!" I picked up the knife.

"If you do this... I'll NEVER forgive you!" You can't kill an animal, not even an insect! Even if you don't like it, or looks ugly, or even scares you! PLEASE!"

The knife was about to come down on it's fat hair butt... HARD & then...

Jackson grabbed my wrist. (You wouldn't tell by looking, but Jackson can be very strong when he wants to be.)

"Rob... please... don't."

& Then something strange happened... I started to think about it. It probably WAS more scared of me than I was of it. & I did have the advantage of being much, much bigger. & It probably thought that I was weird looking too, considering I have 2 less arms, 2 less legs & only 2 eyes. It probably had a home in a jungle... with PLENTY of relatives to turn to & was probably very happy there before it moved (or was FORCED to move) here. Good grief... I'm feeling empathy for something that technically doesn't even have a face.

*sigh..."

Jackson slowly soften his grip of my wrist and eventually, I lowered the knife. "Go... & take your stupid spider w/ you before I change my mind. But 1st, give me my baby."

We made the swap. He gave me the still sleeping Tuffet. She wasn't even aware of the action that took place within the hour. Jackson scooped up Spyddie. We each kissed our babies. I kissed mine on her smooth baby cheek as he kissed his on it's hairy plump back. *Blech...* (I couldn't even kiss my own husband for a week after witnessing that gross set of "p.d.a.").

"Thank you,"said. "I promise... I'll make it up to you."

"You can keep your promise, by KEEPING THAT THING IN IT'S CASE! NEXT TIME IT WON'T BE SO LUCKY!"

"Can do..." he said as his voice faded in the next room, where Spyddie's cage is kept.

Yeah, right. I'll believe it when I see it.

The events of the day had me so exhausted that by the afternoon, I'd had taken a nap.

***** A few hours later!*****

I was fast asleep in bed still locked in my exhaustion, when I felt something tube-like slide... UP... my blanketed leg.

'Oh no he didn't...', I could feel myself say to myself as I was slowly started to awaken. There to greet me was the newest member of our family... Sneaky the Snake. "Oh, yes he did."

& With that, I let out another spine tingling scream...

"JAAAAACCCKKSSSSOOOOONNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"









Miss Muffet's Revenge (Inhumane Version)

Jackson came up to me during my morning workout. I was just in mid-crunch when he said to me tentatively, "Uh... sweetie... Spyddie escaped."

I completed my crunch as a scream escaped from the top of my lungs.

In the year that we had been married, Jackson & I NEVER raised our voices to each other. This time I made an exception.

"THAT'S IT! I... HAVE... HAD IT! IF I'VE TOLD YOU ONCE, I'VE TOLD YOU A THOUSAND TIMES... KEEP THAT DAMNED PET SPIDER OF YOURS IN A COVERED TANK... PREFERABLY OUT OF MY VIEW! YOU KNOW I'M SCARED OF SPIDERS! I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY YOU KEEP THAT SHIT! I DIDN'T ASK MUCH FROM YOU WHEN WE GOT MARRIED!!!! All I asked was to get rid of the spider because it scares me."

"Well, he's scared of you too..." Jackson defended meekly.

"Yeah, but I only have 2 legs! If I find it anywhere near..."

The next thought stopped me dead in my tracks. He waited with bated breath...

"Tuffet... " I said softly. "MY BABY!!!! MY BABY!!!!"

"Oh no..." he added. "Now, Rob, don't do anything rash! Think before you act! I'll check Tuffet."

I could barely here him. By this time I ran into the kitchen & grabbed the largest butcher knife in the cutlery set. "Not my baby..."

"I checked the Tuffet's room. Spyddie's not there & Tuffet's asleep. I'll check the rest of the house!"

"You do that." I said tersely.

I check the baby's room myself. I placed the butcher knife on the floor. Tuffet was fast asleep on her back in her crib making that sucking motion with her tongue as all baby's do as they sleep. I noticed that on her baby table there was still a half-empty bowl of Farina sitting there.

"My little angel... she didn't even finish her..."

And that's when I saw it... out of the corner of my eye... I could see a lump under the baby blanket, just a short distance from my sleeping child's legs. I pulled the cover back and saw the bug slowly crawling toward my child.

That... was the straw... that BROKE my camel's back!

I picked up Tuffet. I lifted her pink bunny jammies to see her clear tan skin. I also looked at her curly sandy brown scalp. No red blotches. No spots. No bite marks. Her little chin rested on my shoulder as her father came in the room. "Still no sign of..."

"Here." I placed Tuffet in his arms and told him to check her legs, because Spyddie was in the crib.

"What are you going to do?" he asked with a sense of urgency in his voice.

"Don't worry about it, Jack. Spyddie was near our child... our SLEEPING child."

He tried to appeal to my sense of reason. "But sweetheart, I had him defanged. & He's not poisonous, never was!"

"I don't care!" I picked up the knife.

"If you do this... I'll NEVER forgive you!" You can't kill an animal, not even an insect! Even if you don't like it, or looks ugly, or even scares you! PLEASE!"

The knife came down on it's butt, making a gross squishing sound. Green spider butt goo oozed in the crib. (We would have the crib incinerated, along w/ "the body" later that day at my insistence.)

"For the sake of the child... another deadly kill..." I hissed. I hunted my prey to the bitter end.

"I can't believe it!" Jackson cried. "You're a killer. I married a killer... an animal killer. What will I say to our child?"

Without missing a beat, I answered his question. "Tell her that her Mommy did it for her own good. That sometimes, Mommies and Daddies must do the unthinkable just to protect the welfare of our children... even if we don't want to."

I looked into his eyes... the same eyes that are shared by Tuffet. He was so hurt. I can only imagine what I had become to him.

I'm sorry Jackson. I'll buy you another pet..." (Thinking better of it...) A DIFFERENT pet! 1 that doesn't have a lot of legs. You know, that I love you & that I never would try to hurt yoooouuuuu..."

With those words I blacked out. Fear & adrenaline got the better of me. I crumpled into Jackson's left arm as Tuffet was still fast asleep in his right.

***** A few hours later!*****

I was fast asleep in bed still locked in my swoon, when I felt something tube-like slide... UP... my blanketed leg.

'Oh no he didn't...', I could feel myself say to myself as I was slowly started to awaken. There to greet me was the newest member of our family... Sneaky the Snake. "Oh, yes he did."

& With that, I let out another spine tingling scream...

"JAAAAACCCKKSSSSOOOOONNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"


-The End-

(Please Note: No animals-- real or imaginary-- were harmed during the making of this story.) {{{{^_^}}}}









ℒℴѵℯ.

ℒℴѵℯ.

Is it alive or is it dead? Is it real... or only in my head?

ℒℴѵℯ.... What happened to it? Where is it? Why does it feel good? Why does it feel bad? Why does it hurt? Why does it kill?

ℒℴѵℯ... Why do we pay for it? Is it for sale? I see it on TV. I hear it on the radio. It's even on the net. It's awesome when it's dry... but we love it even more when it's wet.

ℒℴѵℯ-- Why do we sell it? Steal it? Betray it? Betray for it? Lie on it? Lie for it? & Yes, even die for it?

ℒℴѵℯ-- It makes us happy. It makes us sad. It makes us crazy. It makes us mad.

ℒℴѵℯ-- We advertise, market, sell & ship it. The very word even became a statue in our park.

ℒℴѵℯ-- We sing songs about it. We write books about it. We make movies about it. We make artworks about it. Even comics are plastered with it. (Guess what comic book I'm read now... it's actually called "ℒℴѵℒℯss"! It was written in Japan. See... ? ℒℴѵℯ reaches far & wide.)

ℒℴѵℯ-- It's in the young. It's in the old. It's in our families. It's in our friends. It's cooked in our food, & stitched on our clothes. It's our beginnings, middles, & ends.

ℒℴѵℯ-- We even personify it in our own words. We say "God is ℒℴѵℯ."; "Jesus is ℒℴѵℯ."; Heck, I even heard that #MJ is ℒℴѵℯ.

ℒℴѵℯ-- We are born in it. & If we are lucky, we will die in it, too.

ℒℴѵℯ is the most irrational, painful, hypnotic, weird, stressful, fearful, fearless, feeling ever known to man. & Yet, why do we put up with it? & Why do we do it again?

ℒℴѵℯ-- W/ all of the trouble & joy that it causes, what is it anyway? Is it a gift from God or a curse on man?

You know what...? I'd ℒℴѵℯ to know the answer. But even though I know I won't... I will end it with what I know to be true... I will end it as it should world, by saying only:

"I ℒℴѵℯ you.".


From The Quill of The Lady Robyn









9/11

Never forget...









*Sigh*

... Please see the post for January 27th...

Tags:










I remember once, my dad came to my aunt's house after work for a visit. I heard this loud *POP* so far away... & then another... *POP* & another *POP* & some more, *POP, POP, POP*! @ 1st I was scared & I ran back in the house... but then I came out again & I saw my dad walking up the street popping little mini firecrackers. He would take 1 & threw it on the ground HARD to make it pop! You could hear the sound reverberate thru out the neighborhood. I remember thinking that this was something that he must have LOVED to do when HE was a kid & he just bought some to relive the moment as an adult. I also remember how happy his face was & how cool he looked while doing so. It was just so funny, seeing him do this little kid activity while being so grown. I remember that well. I just wish... I wish that things hadn't changed so much between me & my Daddy.









Another Play...

I'm in another play called "Built On A Lie". It's about a woman & her serial cheating bf. I have a small part as a woman caught up in "baby mama drama". I will tell you more about this later, because I TRULY see this as the start of a new adventure. I'm just rehearsing right now.









Writer's Block: Marital license

That actually might not be a bad idea!









Writer's Block: Cold turkey tremors

When I was in the hospital...









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